Thursday, September 23, 2010

Sleep still alludes me at times. I still feel the fear of darkness and must peer under beds and in closets before turning off the light to ensure myself that there are no monsters lurking in the hidden corners of a room.

I always assumed as a young kid that when I got older I would cease to be afraid of things, that some switch would flip in my mind and I would no longer find "adult things" menacing and large. I find that this is not really the case. One gets used to things that would at first be frightening, gets used to them because they are expected or required, but no switch is flipped, only a gradual progression towards familiarity. Beginnings are still scary.

2 comments:

Abby said...

Praying for you!

Kenna Rivers said...

I think we are never quite grown up, because when you say "when I grow up", there are two different references you could be making. First, to being physically grown up, and second, to being emotionally grown up. The second one doesn't automatically follow the first lol.
So, being afraid of the dark and stuff falls under the second category, I think, and we still have a chance of "growing up" to the point where we can grow out of all our deepest insecurities. I hope...because there are a few I've yet to grow out of too =P