2nd Sunday in Advent

I spent a good deal of this morning anxious, frustrated, and, to be honest, feeling downright crazy (and it might have been more than a feeling).  My thoughts can get so caught up in what should be something simple, and can then be found somewhere far away from their original course.  Trying to distract myself I pulled up facebook (yes, facebook) to find one of the first posts declaring that today is the second Sunday in Advent where we light the advent candle of peace.  I immediately felt my body lose some of its tension.  The Prince of Peace is coming, has come.  "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."

I am so easily discombobulated.  It is so easy to let peace slip past.  It is easy to let the perplexity of people, of words, of emotions, of relationships frustrate.  So much in life is muddled.  I am also the kind of person who wants desperately to understand, and wants to be understood.  This is frustration.  I feel as though I keep having to come back to the places where like in Job, God answers from out of the whirlwind, out of the mess of the storm and says you cannot understand, says it with a lot of sarcasm (which I always kind of loved) says it over and over again using so many various analogies.

 "Then the LORD answered Job out of the whirlwind and said:

“Who is this that darkens counsel by words without knowledge?

Dress for action like a man;

I will question you, and you make it known to me.

“Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth?

Tell me, if you have understanding.

Who determined its measurements—surely you know!

Or who stretched the line upon it?"  (Job 38:1-5 ESV)

However, not stopping there I also need 1 Corinthians 13:12

"For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known."

So then, in a sense I arrive back to where I started.  Words and more words making everything murky, however, thankfully the first 2 advent candles are hope and peace.  There is hope that this frail limited mind that yet seems so complex and frustrating to me can be both known and will know.  For now I only see in part, and that gives me peace as well.  I know (if not at all fully) the one who knows.